duermemucho's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- psychiatry I must have forgotten my medicine yesterday, because I was headachy and jittery and dizzy all damn day. It's the first day some other physical malady has taken the cake away from my bruised balls. I'm much better now, having absorbed today's dose. But I'm sick of this. Medicine withdrawal seems like such a ho-hum topic for a journal, but it's a major bother to me. I want to be rid of this. But I've exhausted almost all my other medication options; they're all either ineffective on me or have undesirable side effects. I suppose I could resort to the toxic tricyclics that people took back before gloominess was cool, but present-day shrinks are leery about prescribing such drugs. And I'm not listening to the anti-medication, anti-intellectual thought police on this one. If I don't take anything at all, I don't shower or emerge from my apartment. I've been there. That doesn't mean I expect to find a drug that will bring me to the set of the Today Show with a bouquet of flowers with nary a stroke of effort, it simply means I have realistic expectations from both my medicine and my own effort. Perhaps that's why I've always had such a hard time with therapy...I'm actually quite comfortable with what I expect from my own thoughts, so I have no goals to set. Enough psychiatric bullshit. I want to put a sign on my apartment door that says "I don't go to your house to talk about biochemistry, so please don't come to my house to talk about Jesus." I can't, because my apartment complex doesn't allow "unapproved" postings on front doors, and anything more descriptive than "no solicitors" would likely go unapproved. The Mormon contingency in this town is surprisingly strong, nothing against Mormons of course. Wait, I take that back...yes, that's a stab at Mormons all right. 4:32 p.m. - 2006-10-19 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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